Today marks the 2 month mark.. Yes that is right in 2 months we hit the due date for our little angel!
I have found over the last week or so that I am not sleeping as much as I use to before I was pregnant. Some reasons are I have to get up every hour to go to the bathroom and my heartburn is so bad that I just sit straight up in bed.
The other reason has to do with the fact that my brain NEVER shuts off. I have always been like this. I remember one night I got up at 3:00 to go pay a bill because I could not stop thinking about it. Well now I am thinking about other things:
Will the epidural work?
Will it hurt?
Will I be able to deliver like I want to deliver?
What if my water breaks in front of my students?
What if I go into labor at home while Patrick is at work?
What if our parents don't make it? (My mom is going to be in the room with us so we really need her there)
How will I ever be a good parent?
What if we don't get the nursery done?
What is she going to look like?
What if I can't nurse?
The list goes on and on.... Patrick tries to tell me to calm down but I wish I could get all the answers right now! I just wish I could shut my brain off at night and be able to sleep while I can! :)
4 comments:
I completely understand. I'm not having all those thoughts yet, but I am never able to shut my brain off at night, so I sypathize.
"What if my water breaks in front of my students?" That one made me laugh out loud. I remember wondering all of these exact same questions. It's a big event and you really don't know what to expect. Everyone's birth experience is different but only let the people who had good ones tell you their story! :)It'll be ok and you'll enjoy every moment of it. It does hurt a little but it's never overwhelming. The worst pain for me, believe it or not, was the IV. If Patrick is at work I'm sure he'll get home with plenty of time to spare. Your parents too. That was one of my biggest worries, both times, since they're three hours away but it worked out both times. What an exciting time for you! Enjoy these last weeks!
Knowing you (since you are just like me), you'll call mom in PLENTY of time and we'll all be there to see Mary Alice when she arrives.
Don't worry. I know that sounds crazy, but just don't.
It will be the most amazing thing you have ever done in your whole life. There's nothing else like looking into the eyes of your baby for the first time and knowing that you are now a Mommy.
Oh, and the dr. had to break my water for me both times.
Hey Ali. Just had to post because of the "your brain never turning off" part. My motto is "I think I think too much". I have the HARDEST time sleeping at night. I've found that puzzles help me more than anything. Nothing too strenuous or too competitive. I used to do these math-type crosswords, then sudoku. Now I have a Nintendo DS and have several puzzle games on there I play before bed. Reading works for me sometimes but I generally get too into what I'm reading and although it does keep my mind off things - I end up staying up all night reading!! Hope you find something that helps. Also, keep a notepad by your bed to write down the things you're thinking. Knowing you have it documented and won't forget it may help ease your mind. And one last thing (to end the longest blog comment ever!), I'll tell you what I tell every mom-to-be: childbirth is the absolute worst pain I've ever experienced in my life. BUT, it's is absolutely amazing how quickly you forget about it. When it's all over and done you'll only feel like you've been there like 20 minutes and then you have this wonderful, beautiful creature that you MADE in your arms. It also can't be that bad or everyone would be an only child! :) Lots of warm, fuzzy wishes to you and I'll be thinking of you in the next couple months, hoping everything goes as you want it to.
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